Life Begins at 30

I wore my thinking cap again today and it made me feel good. Really good. After what seemed like the longest and darkest week of my life, for the first time, I smiled again. Not for any reason  in particular, but because deep inside of me, I felt better. My sore throat is gone, I didn’t feel tired, my head was clear, my heart is free… Today, I was at my best and it felt awesome!

What changed overnight? You might ask. I was deeply moved, if not touched by God’s grace. Not only through friends who have been offering me support all this time (yes, they are my angels, I don’t know what I’d do without them!), but also through the words of Bo Sanchez, my brother’s favorite writer. In his blog, he wrote about The Only Thing That Can Heal Your Emotional Wounds and I’d like to quote something that really struck my core. He wrote:

But when a person forgives, he’s like opening a window in a smelly room because one person stepped on poop. Fresh air comes in. If bitterness wounds everyone, forgiveness heals everyone too.

It is a very simple statement that holds a lot of truth in it. I had the chance to mull this over last night and I realized that indeed, I should not allow other people to control my feelings. Simply put, I can get angry but never let that anger kill me or my relationship with everyone else around me.

So this morning, I woke up with a renewed commitment to forgive myself, to love and to share that love with others. This is the start of my healing. Yes, I do not deny the fact that I am still emotionally wounded, but it gets better in time. I am certain of that.

True enough, when you release your pain, when you share your sorrows with people who care about you, the burden becomes lighter.  So light even, that you barely know it’s there. As I start cleaning my emotional wounds, I pray that God will also touch your hearts and heal your own wounds.